light it up
Sunday, June 21, 2009
I think I've reached a point where enough is enough.
I can't understand why am I doing this for. It doesn't seem right to me.
It's been 7 years and everything still remains unchanged.
I guess deep down inside everyone hearts we knew the problem, but not one even dared to speak of it or do something about it.
I guess, maybe it's really time for me to go.
But is it really possible?
*****************************************************************************
I need to stop thinking about so many things. Stop wishing and pleading for this and that.
It never happens, no matter how hard or how much i want.
Many times my mind want to succumb to my foolish thinkings, but my heart tells me not to.
I can't decipher what is right and what is wrongg. I feel as if I'm being pulled at both ends.
I'm entertaining the thought which is the biggest joke of the century, yet I still believed it's true.
When will I ever be still to listen to Him?
I can't understand why am I doing this for. It doesn't seem right to me.
It's been 7 years and everything still remains unchanged.
I guess deep down inside everyone hearts we knew the problem, but not one even dared to speak of it or do something about it.
I guess, maybe it's really time for me to go.
But is it really possible?
*****************************************************************************
I need to stop thinking about so many things. Stop wishing and pleading for this and that.
It never happens, no matter how hard or how much i want.
Many times my mind want to succumb to my foolish thinkings, but my heart tells me not to.
I can't decipher what is right and what is wrongg. I feel as if I'm being pulled at both ends.
I'm entertaining the thought which is the biggest joke of the century, yet I still believed it's true.
When will I ever be still to listen to Him?
1:01 AM
Wednesday, June 10, 2009
I shouldn't be here. But I guess I couldn't resist coming here for just "a while".
I happened to chance upon some of my primary school friends' blog while blog hopping. Everyone has changed so much and so caught up with their own life. I guess our paths as classmates do cross, but once. Looking back at the old times, I kinda wished that I hadn't been such a mean person. Maybe, my life in primary school would have been more memorable(even though it's quite memorable to me already)
I got saw the 6I forum that we used to have but couldn't sign in because I forgot what my user name and password was. I guess that shows long I haven't been to that page already. Maybe if we were to have a gathering one day and I were to show up, going up to people to say hi; blank faces would be staring back at me, all with the same question in mind, "just who the heck are you?"
Well,maybe it was my fault though, that I chose to abandon my past and embrace my new life once I stepped into secondary school. And I'm not at all regretful about the choice which I've made. Being here in Crescent, with my classmates and cca friends, it's like the best time of my life. I couldn't have asked for more. I've tasted and I do hunger for more of this type of adventure. Things here are like rides on a roller coaster, so wild, exciting and fun. I'm thankful that I got into this school, if not I would never have met such important and dear people in my life.
I guess people do leave their footprints in our life as we continue to travel in our journey of life. Even though many a times we complain about the stupid politics that Crescent has to offer but deep down in our hearts we know that this school of ours has given us a rocking time of our life. The thought of just leaving all that I have now, all that I'm so attached to, all these things which I've took for granted, is just simply saddening. I hate to say goodbye but I do have to move on in life. Just a few more months and we'll be through - for good.
Till then, let me treasure all that I've took for granted.
I happened to chance upon some of my primary school friends' blog while blog hopping. Everyone has changed so much and so caught up with their own life. I guess our paths as classmates do cross, but once. Looking back at the old times, I kinda wished that I hadn't been such a mean person. Maybe, my life in primary school would have been more memorable(even though it's quite memorable to me already)
I got saw the 6I forum that we used to have but couldn't sign in because I forgot what my user name and password was. I guess that shows long I haven't been to that page already. Maybe if we were to have a gathering one day and I were to show up, going up to people to say hi; blank faces would be staring back at me, all with the same question in mind, "just who the heck are you?"
Well,maybe it was my fault though, that I chose to abandon my past and embrace my new life once I stepped into secondary school. And I'm not at all regretful about the choice which I've made. Being here in Crescent, with my classmates and cca friends, it's like the best time of my life. I couldn't have asked for more. I've tasted and I do hunger for more of this type of adventure. Things here are like rides on a roller coaster, so wild, exciting and fun. I'm thankful that I got into this school, if not I would never have met such important and dear people in my life.
I guess people do leave their footprints in our life as we continue to travel in our journey of life. Even though many a times we complain about the stupid politics that Crescent has to offer but deep down in our hearts we know that this school of ours has given us a rocking time of our life. The thought of just leaving all that I have now, all that I'm so attached to, all these things which I've took for granted, is just simply saddening. I hate to say goodbye but I do have to move on in life. Just a few more months and we'll be through - for good.
Till then, let me treasure all that I've took for granted.
12:41 AM
Tuesday, June 2, 2009
Finally, the battle of 01062009 is over.
I'm relieved. I got to write my story afterall. :)
I still hope my DSA application works out with the JC that I want. I don't really like the idea of applying for many JCs too. And considering the fact that I don't have a lot of talents to start with.
Sigh. A lot of things been going through my head lately; getting distracted despite the fact that Os was still round the corner.
On a lighter note:
HAPPY 16th BIRTHDAY!!!!
KELLY(my ACBC plt mate), HOOI CHOO(my chipmunk plt mate)
and CHIH-YIN(my dearest LAO GONG!)!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I hope after you gays turn 16, continue to be childish and retarded. So that I can look more matured
beside you. HAHAHAHA!
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
All the news reports, it seems to set me thinking. That all a long I was in a really sheltered area; protected from the outside world. I suddenly feel as if I'm Laura from GM. Other than the fact that I'm not crippled or as introverted as her. I always thought that - was a safe place, free of the worldly "crimes" that usually happened in the adults world.
But I guess I'm wrong. - turned out to be the same anyway. I guess the world isn't a very nice place as I thought it was. Many of man's ugly nature had revealed itself overtime.
Things that I thought only happened in the adult world are even occuring in the youths right now. It's scaring me. What worries me is that how am I going to protect myself from this ugly revolution.
I hope I can be a kid and free myself from the worries of the world.
I am disgusted. Truly I am.
God, please save the world.
I'm relieved. I got to write my story afterall. :)
I still hope my DSA application works out with the JC that I want. I don't really like the idea of applying for many JCs too. And considering the fact that I don't have a lot of talents to start with.
Sigh. A lot of things been going through my head lately; getting distracted despite the fact that Os was still round the corner.
On a lighter note:
HAPPY 16th BIRTHDAY!!!!
KELLY(my ACBC plt mate), HOOI CHOO(my chipmunk plt mate)
and CHIH-YIN(my dearest LAO GONG!)!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I hope after you gays turn 16, continue to be childish and retarded. So that I can look more matured
beside you. HAHAHAHA!
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
All the news reports, it seems to set me thinking. That all a long I was in a really sheltered area; protected from the outside world. I suddenly feel as if I'm Laura from GM. Other than the fact that I'm not crippled or as introverted as her. I always thought that - was a safe place, free of the worldly "crimes" that usually happened in the adults world.
But I guess I'm wrong. - turned out to be the same anyway. I guess the world isn't a very nice place as I thought it was. Many of man's ugly nature had revealed itself overtime.
Things that I thought only happened in the adult world are even occuring in the youths right now. It's scaring me. What worries me is that how am I going to protect myself from this ugly revolution.
I hope I can be a kid and free myself from the worries of the world.
I am disgusted. Truly I am.
God, please save the world.
Labels: I wanna be a kid again.
12:26 PM